After 5 years dealing with a sacrum that painfully shifts, I took my M.D’s advice to try a combination of western medicine and eastern energy work.
I signed up for Elizabeth Neuse Flint’s workshop on the 6th chakra at Yogaworks, using basic shamanic self-healing techniques, because I had heard she was a great instructor.
The part that worried me: asana practice. My biggest secret as a yoga instructor is that I haven’t practiced for years in a classroom and I have a home practice I'm not sure can be called yoga. Most importantly, I had stopped trusting my body.
A dozen of us listened to Neuse Flint give an overview of chakras 1-5. She described the second sacral chakra, in the pelvic area, as being about accepting your shadow self; those parts of yourself you don’t love. I was reminded that, after 4 years of trying to hide my issue - from clients, friends and even at times myself - I was now in exactly the right place.
When we started moving, I told myself, “today is the day I am going to start trusting again.” Neuse Flint’s slow flow was perfect. Even though most of the class heard me explain my injury, I still worried they were wondering why I moved so stiffly and awkwardly. But then I realized, I didn’t care. I was too excited I was actually practicing again!
Neuse Flint pulled out a Native American tarot deck called Vision Quest. We each drew a card then paired up with two other people to lay our cards out and write our own “fictional” story about them.
I stifled a laugh when I saw the irony of the cards. First was The Ten of Air: Negative Thinking (my card), second the Two of Water: Love; and the third card was XIII: Transformation. I didn’t need a “story” because the three cards were obvious. I struggle with negative/critical thinking of myself and deemed my power word of the year to be love (specifically self love) as I know that is my key to my transformation.
Iwas very fidgety as we read our stories aloud. Despite feeling like I’ve become quite transparent about my story, I realized I still have work to do becoming comfortable with my shadow side.
The final exercise, the Chakra Illumination for the Third Eye, was the cherry on the sundae. We were asked to bring a rock. I have a very special one that has served as a totem of my internal strength. When Neuse Flint chose me to demonstrate on, I didn’t hesitate to sprawl into the middle of the circle to receive her healing.
I wanted to let go of negative thinking and blew that portion into my rock. Then, I hovered my fingers over my third eye opening the chakra as she had instructed. Neuse Flint placed my rock directly on my third eye and did a few luscious cranial-massage techniques pressing her fingers gently but firmly at the base of my skull and then hovered her hands over my third eye and heart chakras for a few minutes. She removed the rock, I closed my third eye and took the rock into my hands. I blew into the rock again, blowing for what I wished to become (transformation).
Afterwards we were on our way, rocks in hand, to look at the world through our enhanced third eye.
I took Neuse Flint’s advice of creating a vision board of what my transformation would
look like when I got home. Then I began remembering my dreams and noticed myself feeling more intuitive, almost like I often knew what the answer was or what I needed to do for my injury - both my physical injury and old psychological injuries in my life that needed clearing up.
While I still wanted to fight the hard decisions, I felt like it was finally time to move towards transformation, no matter how scary or hard it seemed.